May 17, 2013

Paint Portfolio: they said you was high classed



                          
                          
                          





The FAB family does not discriminate by species. Party Pants for everyone!
Follow the adventures of Big Poodle here, one of my very favorite things on all of the internet.

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May 16, 2013

MSPaint portfolio: October song


Last year, Christine and I discussed what she should wear for Halloween…

XJ:
I told the one person that would get it about my brilliant Bat Out of Hell costume idea and he had a good laugh. I’m so tempted by the idea, but I don’t want to have to explain it all night long.

Anyway, there you have it.

KJ:
For Halloween (or maybe just in general) I think you should knit a shirt where each of your arms is the trunk of an elephant (two elephants total) and then you should hang a sign around each of their “necks” saying Gerald, and then you could be Elephants Gerald all night.

(This is a punchline both Mark and Evan came up with independently)

I have illustrated the concept:



XJ:
That is pretty freaking funny. I don’t know that I have the time to knit an entire elephant sweater before halloween, but I could probably come up with something. I do have a grey long sleeve shirt I almost never wear anymore… What else do you have?

I am pretty sure that I would never ever have come up with that ever, and yet you know two other people that did independently. Weird.

KJ:
Carry a spear. Shake it at people.
“I’m Shakes spear.”

Wear a bathing suit, with a sign around your neck saying “one last time!”
“Once more unto the beach, my friends!”

Carry an oar and a dagger.
“Murder, she rowed.”

Dress as a lizard, but your tail has fallen off and you’re holding it in your hand. “Reptile dysfunction.”

(anything? anything?)

XJ:
Oh man those are all so good! I like them all so much! The swimsuit one is good, I may have to wear it over my clothes though…

hilarious.

What about an elaborate shiny rock costume with dreadlocks. “Dread Pyrite Roberts.”
KJ:
Ha!

Dress as a gnome who is wearing an impeccable new suit and man purse, and incidentally keeps excellent time. Metro-gnome.

XJ:
hahaha. incidentally keeps excellent time. hahahaha. i could put my metronome in my pocket and just beep all evening in perfect time. i love it.

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May 12, 2013

MS Paint Portfolio: draculus vulgaris


I can bring my computer into meetings now.





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May 11, 2013

MS Paint Portfolio: Fabric of our lives


I’ve been experimenting with fabric design over at Spoonflower.com, using Paint of course. If you know how fun it is designing anything in Paint, just think how fun it is trying to create a repeating pattern!

Here’s a few, created for the contests they hold every week:


“Swirl of Chicks”
(based on this original)



“Where do Pysansky Eggs Come From?”



“A Buncha Budgies”


Spoonflower has an entertaining function where they show what your stuff would look like as wallpaper:








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May 2, 2013

Three cool cats


Friend Adam P, who is also into MS Paint, sent out a party invite today ending with:

»
Bring: Your party pants. And some booze.

Hope to see you all there - if you have friends, relatives or dogs that you want to invite, please forward this e-mail to them. All are welcomed (except cats).
»

The following ensued:

KJ:

image


Adam:
AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA

this is amazing!!!!!

he can come.

KJ:
image


Adam:
This jerk is NOT allowed!!!

He’ll eat all the cheese and scare all of the children!!

I hate him.

KJ:
oh no! he should have quit while he was ahead

Adam:
If we allow the cats to show up, this is what I’m assuming will happen.


image




Touché, touché. You win this round, Adam! And every round, because you are amazing.
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May 2, 2013

Space lord mother mother


My maternal unit has accused me—me!—of not posting enough. And since my mother is always right about everything, I will attempt to rectify this issue. I’m still snowed under at work, but surely there must be some prolixity to consolidate?

Yes indeed. To start with, Aemon and I have been beavering (space-beavering??) away on spaceoters.tumblr.com. Here are the posts that have gone live since my last round-up:

Hupyrian Beetle
Pyrithian Moon Hawk
Bardakian pronghorn moose
Kavarian tiger-bat
Filian python
Barrowbug
Screech rhino
Gunji jackdaw
Denobulan lemur
Denebian whale


Pyrithian Moon Hawk is probably my favorite so far, but I pretty much love all of them. It has been great fun working on a project with such an enthusiastic and talented partner!

In the MS Paint category, here is a banner I made for the blog:

image


Obviously the image is Aemon’s, but the bottom maroon bar and lettering: that’s all MS paint, baby!

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February 15, 2013

with voyeuristic intention


Haven’t been MSPainting much lately, but here’s one for the ol’ portfolio:

image

Based on a conversation Evan heard in his office:

Evan: “april is the month that we’re REALLY just going to be focusing on cats, and really any kind of cat content.”
Evan: delivered in 100% serious business tones.
Evan: earlier, “yes, of course, i love the idea of cat videos.”
Evan: another bit i overheard from her a few weeks ago concerned a “cat portal.”
me: that’s how i imagine the internet talking to itself.


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January 15, 2013

MSPaint Portfolio: SBL


In his new role as young entrepreneur, Mark sometimes goes off to see “the Small Business lady.” This is what I picture, each and every time:





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December 31, 2012

MS Paint Portfolio: V Is For Vuncomfortable


Happy New Year, all! Here is a recent MS Paint concoction, presented without explanation:




May all our 2013s be sweet and bizarre, in equal parts.


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December 17, 2012
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October 19, 2012
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October 18, 2012

MS Paint Portfolio: 9 to 5 (AM)


This is my last week at work, and I’ve been feeling very mixed emotions. Although I’m excited for a new challenge, it’s difficult to leave teammates and co-workers as great as mine have been for the last two years.

Illustrated notes from a meeting in April:


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October 15, 2012

MS Paint Portfolio: b1 and day


Mark: What are you guys reading for bookclub this month?
KJ: Tender Is The Night.
Noah: It’s a romance novel, set in medieval times.





I loved that joke so much that I reinterpreted it:




Which just goes to show that I should never be allowed to illustrate babies. Terrifying! But even more terrifying, I just did a search and discovered that this actually exists:

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September 12, 2012

MS Paint Portfolio: amaizeing


A card I made for a coworker recently who received a (well-deserved!) promotion:




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September 7, 2012

MS Paint Portfolio: 1,001 yellow daffodils


At work, right after I got back from Africa…



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